When it comes to habit building, I’ve never been the best. I get excited about something and jump into it enthusiastically. The problem arises when I have to continue that thing day after day after day. Habits aren’t built overnight, in order to make something into a habit you have to commit to doing that on a consistent basis.
I’ve always relied on motivation to do things; motivation to accomplish the goal I set for myself, motivation to get better at something, motivation to put myself in a situation to succeed. I would lift weights when I felt motivated to do it. I would make videos when I felt inspired. I would take photos when the situation was right and felt good. But motivation runs out. Whether it was a video getting fewer views, a photo not coming out the way I had envisioned it, or playing poorly in a basketball game, there were constant things that would deter my motivation. Which, as you’d expect, would result in not practicing that skill for days, weeks, and sometimes even months. I knew things would never work for me if I always relied on motivation, but I wasn’t sure where else to look.
In the video I made for my 30th birthday I asked my older siblings to give any words of wisdom they may have for me as I turned 30. One of the things my brother, Jordan, said really struck me:
“Discipline, self-discipline, will get you to wherever you want to go, no matter where it is. Whatever you want to do in your life, wherever you want to go, whatever you want your life to look like… Discipline will get you there. A little increment every day, gets you to where you want to go.”
This didn’t stand out to me because I had never thought of it, but rather because this was what I was trying to implement into my life. I was making a conscious effort to be a more disciplined person. So when I received a voice note from Jordan that affirmed what I had already been trying to make common practice, I doubled down.
There’s a popular YouTuber that I watch frequently, Matt D’Avella, who talks a lot about self-improvement and habit building. One of the things that he has mentioned time and time again through his videos is what he calls the Two-Day Rule. Simply put, the Two-Day Rule is that if you are trying to build a habit, you do not allow yourself to take two consecutive days off. It’s virtually impossible to do something every single day without fail, so if you give yourself enough grace to take one day off, force yourself to dive back into things the next day.
As I’ve been making an effort to train myself to become a more disciplined person, I have tried to implement this rule. When I don’t feel well enough to go to the gym, I give myself a break on the condition that I go back tomorrow - no excuses. It has helped me develop a healthy relationship with the habits that I’m trying to build and prevented me from burning out.
I apply the same thought process into creative endeavors. Whether it’s video, photos, or writing I force myself to do something creative every day that I can. And if a day comes and goes and I can’t do it… take a beat, breathe, and get back to it tomorrow.